Therapy: A Space to Remind you: YOU MATTER!

I’ve been receiving energy-work for as long as I’ve been giving it...but I recently started working weekly with a therapist for the first time in years.

I’ve chosen to make a living holding space for others...but I haven’t given myself the same time and space to be witnessed.

Every session I’ve had so far, I’ve cried. And I don’t mean an occasional tear here and there, I mean I am letting it RIP. And not because I’m going through any major loss or depression or anything...in fact, my life is changing and transforming in the most amazing of ways right now.

I cry because someone is holding the space for me to be witnessed. I cry because someone else truly wants to SEE me and has a real interest in knowing my deepest thoughts and feelings, along with watching every move I make in the time we have together.

I cry because I feel like I MATTER again and I’ve spent way too long feeling like I didn’t. I spent way to much time putting everyone else’s needs and desires before my own. 

And it’s different then sharing with a friend...for me there’s always some place inside where I feel like I need to reciprocate or keep the sharing balanced when I’m being that intimate with a friend. It’s such a relief to have 50-minutes every week where I can just make it 110% about me.

It’s also so beautiful to remember that I get to do this for people for a living. Lots of times I’m so focused on what energy needs to be cleared with someone that I forgotten how valuable it is to just hold space and give someone else 110% of my attention and willingness to see them. That in of itself is transformative.

And I’m grateful now that I’m finding the balance between the two. It feels like starting therapy is just one of the ways in which I’m beginning (again) to own the “Receiver” in Keri Sender-Receiver.

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The Divine Masculine

I’m getting very present to my masculine side and taking a look at how evolved it is.

We hear so much talk nowadays in conscious communities about women embodying the Divine Feminine...but what about the Goddess embodying the Divine Masculine as well? 

How can we take action without our old constructs of force, manipulation, and competition? How can we generate from our hearts instead of our heads?

And what about men embodying the Divine Feminine inside of them, too. We all have aspects and energies of both genders. We all harness the Sun and the Moon, the yin and the yang. How can we move towards a reality where Love prevails and the dichotomy dissolves without us even looking deeply at the dichotomy within ourselves?

 

Power.

What does it mean to be Powerful?

In the patriarchal and hierarchical ways of the past (in the Age of Pices) being powerful meant being forceful. It meant "I'm better than you" or "I'm stronger".

It meant I can defeat you.

It was the teacher in grade school who made you sit in the corner for something you didn't do. It was the boss with the very high government position who sent you blackberry messages at 6am and expected you to respond immediately. (and yes, these are examples from my own life).

Within the new paradigm of the Aquarian Age, the realm of the Divine Feminine, and the era of 'You Are Your Own Guru' - Being Powerful simply means being yourSelf. It means being who you really are, in every moment, in every situation and with every one.

What a difference, huh?

For a lot of my life I didn't allow myself to be powerful in the new sense of the word. In fact, I gave my power away to make others feel comfortable.

I withheld who I was so that I wouldn't rock the boat....and in the process, I forgot who I was. I lost my power. I gave my power away. I lost myself.

I got real good at playing the part of whatever role I gave myself to placate the world around me.

And I started to believe my own acting so much that I couldn't tell the difference anymore.

We don't live in a society that generally speaking encourages us to be powerful and to be ourselves. Especially if we're women. We are still being brainwashed to think this way, buy this, be this to be happy. Although it has gotten much better over the years. I think of my Mother's generation and how little women where encouraged to be or think for themselves...we've come a long way, baby indeed.

There's still work to do though, and the good news is that it is easy see when you slip away from your power (because Being Powerful IS a Practice.). The outside world will reflect a version of you that's different than who you know yourself to be. Maybe it's a stranger who interacts with you in a way that's totally out of alignment for you. Maybe it's the way you feel when you're in the presence of a friend...

Just the other day, this man I know a little from around town stopped me in the store and said: "Keri -- You, You're a tough cookie."

He got me. And it felt soooo good.

Don't be fooled by my big smile and upbeat energy. I am definitely one tough cookie. And when I'm really in my power, I'm not hiding any parts of me. I'm owning the tough cookie and letting her shine without apology.

So no matter how tough of a cookie you are, be kind and gentle with yourself and practice being yourself. Just practice.

Before you know it, your Power will be so present that people can't help but be drawn to you like a magnet. No force. No coercion. Simply authenticity in magical action.

Real Power.

And imagine a world where everyone was really in their true Power....

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True Freedom

When we remember that we are consciousness, that we are everything, that there’s only one of us here, and that love IS the answer we can unhook ourselves from the social norms and mores that keep us bound inside a box. 

When we remember who we really are, in that moment the box blows it’s lid and real freedom is possible. 

We are SO burdened with the “should” and “shouldn't” that not only do we not even realize they’re there, we end up internalizing them and imposing the shackles on ourselves.

When we remember that we are everything that IS, we rip a hole in the reality that has been, and weave a new tapestry of a reality that could be.

THIS...this is the pathway to True Freedom. 

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Weekly Tarot with Keri: Week of November 13, 2017

6 of Wands and Page of Wands

Success is found by working together. Include others - or the group - in your new creative actions and endeavors.

Be courageous, confident and enthusiastic with your new adventure(s) and know that working with others will bring you victory. You will be more centered with others help.

Mirrors

Blessed to have just spent a week in London, England at a 5Rhythms dance meditation workshop called “Mirrors”.

We danced deep with ourselves to get to know the reflections that our own ego characters cast, and looked into the mirrors that we hold for each other within relationships.

Mirrors can be distorted if you don’t look for the Truth. Projections warp faces, and stories can cloak reality in a shroud of unnecessary darkness.

I learned in this workshop that to truly see, you have to really listen.

And I’m grateful for all the mirrors in my Life which help me to see...

I cracked open in this workshop. It came out of nowhere. I put down my masks and allowed myself to be vulnerable and I was met with pure connection and pure love...

It’s amazing how much time and energy we spend wearing the masks our ego creates. So much energy protecting ourselves from connection and from Life when all we actually want to do is connect, and to Live.

Through Mirrors, I saw my ego and then went beyond it, straight to pure Soul in human form...What a deep dance that is.

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My Breakdown in Cell 53.

Let me start off by letting you know that I'm writing this while I'm meant to be meditating in the Sattipathana Sutta Vipassana 8-day silent meditation course I'm taking. Don't tell anyone that I was using the pen and paper they gave us to learn and study the Sutta for the following Divine expression to come out. Such is the life of a writer...

My breakdown came out of nowhere.

I was sitting in my assigned cell #53 in the Pagoda, ready to start the 3:30pm-5pm sit and it just hit me:

Is this what I want to do with my Life?

Then the tears started flowing and they didn't stop for an hour.

So often we get caught up in what we think we're "supposed to do" -- whether it be making a living in a certain way, relating to loved ones and the people around us in a certain way, or possessing all the material things that we think will make us happy and stable -- that we don't take the time to actually BE ourselves and do what we want with Life.

We're chained to the constraints of this reality we created without even realizing it most of the time. 

We limit the expansion of ourselves and Life for the sake of following what we've been told to do and how we've been told to act, that we don't allow ourselves the freedom to be who we really are.

So that's why I cried for an hour in cell 53.

I cried to mourn that loss of the freedom that's prohibited all of us from being our TRUE Selves, and through those tears I realized how much I desire us all to be FREE. 

We require the freedom to be ourselves.
To Unlock Who We Really Are.

Think of how much we will thrive if we have the freedom to live, love and express ourselves in a way that feels most authentic to us all of the time.

Endless possibilities for Life will have the space to emerge... 

When I was back in New York City last week, I spent a day being with my parents in NJ. They took me out to lunch and a little shopping and it was all very nice and sweet, but what made the day most memorable was one moment when my father and I were on his patio looking up at the trees. He told me how much he loves the sound of them blowing in the wind, and I said how much I enjoy watching them dance in the breeze.

The truth is I'll eventually throw away or use up the things they bought me, and I don't even remember the name of the restaurant we went to that day, but I will always - for as long as I live - look at the trees dancing and take the time to also listen to them the way my father loves.

THIS is what matters.
THIS is freedom in connection and expression.

So whether it's your partner or your parents or your dog or your job or your life, please take the time to ask yourself: What matters to me most?

What would I do if I allowed myself to be totally free and didn't follow the way I thought I was supposed to act, be and live?

Maybe it means changing your life completely or maybe it means asking someone who you care about deeply what they like most about the trees...

Just earlier today I asked a very big, old and wise tree here at the meditation center what advice it had for me and it replied: "Be True to Yourself in every moment and watch everything change."

Let's commit to being True to ourselves in every moment so that we can be Free.

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We Should Find Out Who We Really Are

Lenny Kravitz nailed it:
"We should take time out to really Love
We should find out who we really are"

My time inside the heart of NYC is getting me re-present to the sack of lies we are being sold...from consumerism to work ethic to our priorities in Life.

I see millions of miserable people being herded like cattle to their 9 to 5 jobs so they can make enough money to buy the meaningless shit they think will buy them happiness.

When will we BREAK FREE from the chains of the "shoulds", from how we've been told it's supposed to go and supposed to be and take the time to really BE ourselves?!?

To UNLOCK WHO WE REALLY ARE.

"All I want to do is just be Real And get off of the spinning wheel..."

P.s. I think this was too confronting for Midtown Manhattan because I got kicked off of the "private property" I was dancing on... It's all good though, I danced my way home. 

Music: Take Time by Lenny Kravitz

SPIRITuAl(l) Guidance Tarot Reading for the week of September 25th

SPIRITuAl(l) Guidance Tarot Reading for the week of September 25th: Stick with it and You Will Succeed 💪🏾✨

10 of Wands: You've got a lot on your plate right now, maybe feeling burdened or doing other people's work.

The Chariot: You will have what you need to succeed.

5 of Swords (the Victor/Victim card) : Stick with it, don't give up. If you don't try, you lose. But if you put effort in, you will succeed.